I admit I have a lot on my plate and to tell you the truth, that’s how I prefer it. An overachieving, workaholic may be a suitable title or a want-to-be superwoman may also fit. I have two babies, a husband and a house to take care of in addition to my jobs. Contrary to some of the hype, I do have a job, a few of them actually. I am a Substance Abuse Prevention Director, an adjunct English Instructor, a blogger and an entrepreneur. So the magic question has been, how do I fit it all in and the answer is simple, I have learned not to sweat the small stuff.
In the lengthy list of titles that apply to me, you won’t find, perfectionist. I removed that a long time ago. The perfectionist me would have anxiety attacks about being late. The perfectionist me wouldn’t ask my spouse to put the babies to bed. The perfectionist me would not dare go to bed with dishes in the sink and the list goes on and on. But the perfectionist me ended up with six ulcers. The perfectionist me would some time cry from pure exhaustion. Everything was a priority, which meant nothing out valued anything else.
So I made a list of what was most important to me; my marriage, my children, my health and my career. Then, I made a decision to let go of everything else. I decided I wanted to work from home to spend more time with my children. I decided I wanted to spend quality time with my husband. I decided I wanted to exercise and lose weight. And I decided I wanted to re-invent myself professionally. It was that simple.
Now with all those decisions came a whole lot of letting go. I no longer get upset if my family goes a whole week living out of laundry baskets. I no longer feel less than if I run to Sam’s Club for an already prepared chicken and bag salad for dinner versus cooking. I no longer get up in the middle of the night if I fell asleep with dishes in my sink. I no longer feel the need to prove I don’t need help raising my children and the list goes on.
Still my choices include what some would consider sacrifices. I only watch about an hour of television a day. No, House Wives of Atlanta, or Love and Hip Hop for me. I absolutely do not have lengthy telephone conversations, in fact I rarely know where my phone is, especially after 5 p.m. I choose my extracurricular activities very carefully and I am clear and upfront about my level of participation in those that make the cut.
So here are my personal sanity rules:
I do what I can, when I can.
I go to bed when I am sleepy.
I ask for help, from my husband, my momma and my friends.
I forgive myself daily for falling short and commit to do better tomorrow.
I keep lists, a grocery list, a wish list, and a got to do list.
I pray about everything.
Having said all that I also know I have not yet “arrived. “I still have a lot of things to figure out. I still haven’t figured out how to workout everyday and I still haven’t figured out girl time, or better yet “me” time. But then again, that’s what tomorrow is for, right?