Let me get my Bible

Every day the good Lord allows me to be woken up by one of my children I begin with a small prayer to be kind, enjoy the ride and be patient. It always starts out great, lots of hugs and kisses, snuggling and singing. But usually by the end of the day, after dinner has been served my patience starts wearing a little thin. How many times to do I have to repeat myself? How many times do I have to ask a toddler to listen? How many times can I be pooped on, peed on, spit up on without snapping back?

So the other day I must have asked Morgan to do something or other fifty times too many and I found my voice getting higher and higher. Oh my gosh, am I going to be one of those mommies that go around yelling all the time? I refuse.  In an effort to keep my sanity and not put her over my knee, I humbly ask her to sit on my lap so we can talk. “Morgan lately, I feel like you don’t listen to me when I am speaking to you and it makes me really upset. I don’t like to raise my voice and I don’t want to be a mommy who yells all the time. I really need you to listen to me, okay?” She apologetically says she is sorry and I am hopeful that she will at least try.

Within five minutes, we are at it again. “Morgan please be quiet, your brother is not feeling well and trying to sleep.” Two minutes pass and I find myself totally irritated. “Morgan REALLY, I am so going to pop your butt if I have to talk to you again. This is ridiculous.” And then she says it.

“Let me get my bible.” So I immediately look to my husband because I really can’t believe that an almost 3-year-old is pulling out scripture to prove her point with her momma. My husband hides his laughter behind a sheet of paper he is working on as she proudly trots her 24 pound butt to the end of the sofa to get her child bible her uncle and auntie gave her for Christmas in 2010. She gets the mini child version with a man with a staff and a lamb on the front and holds in one hand and waves it in my face and says “The bible says….the bible says…the bible says to BE NICE mommy.”

Are you serious right now. I am telling you people, I can’t make this stuff up. So I say “no, the bible says to honor thy mother and father. That’s what the bible says.” She indignantly replies “No, no, it says to be nice, so you can’t pop my butt, because the bible says to be nice.”

So, I know all the textbooks say not to break character when disciplining but they obviously did not have one of THESE type children. At this point, I am cracking up. This little girl is trying to talk me down from whopping her butt by using her children’s bible.

Not to be upstaged by her, I end the conversation by reminding her that the bible also says to honor thy mother and father. Truthfully, I am not sure she bought it, but the laughter she caused did provide her a reprieve until bedtime on the pop on the butt.

I honestly don’t think I have EVER pulled out the bible to prove a point, but I do know enough of it to have caught a few versus.

Proverbs 22:6

Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.

So despite our occasional Sunday sleep-ins, I went to bed that night a little more confident in the fact that obviously we are doing something right. I think.


10 thoughts on “Let me get my Bible

  1. Lol. After my long day with the devil trying to steal my joy. That really has made my night. AMEN, Morgan. Love you to pieces! 🙂

  2. I agree that ME has wisdom beyond her years!! How appropriate for her to grab the word to prove her point. How could you chastise her or better yet spank her little butt after that?! I love her, just for being her. She’s so a mini “U”!!

  3. Im a frnd of your husbands n now a fan of yours. I truly njoyd reading ur blog, n i must say it is totally on point. I too am raising “one” of those kids. Its a joy n a challenge on every hand.

  4. Lol!!! Morgan E. is off the chain! I can see Todd’s facial expression hiding behind the paper. This story will be tough to beat in the humor dept. You guys are great.

    • Hump, I am not the comedian your little cousin is and I think her brother will be too. So although I may have trouble beating this story….I am sure they will give me another one. They always do.

  5. Girl!!!! Sounds like you got a female Moo on your hands (read some of my posts sometimes on fb about my 8 year-old lol) – precocious, witty, and mischievous….welcome to the “What Am I Gonna Do With This Child Club?” You should’ve read the scripture to her about sparing the rod and spoiling the child, that usually shuts Moo down… Keep posting and stay encouraged….

  6. Hey Keischa, since your little momma is 8, I will review your page often for pointers. Cause if mine keeps this up, I can’t imagine her when she is that old, it’s all I can take to make it right now. Pray for me. LOL

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